The Best Nigieran Spam EVER!

Oh sure. Some people have the right in-boxes…

Kathryn Cramer of ‘Years Best Fantasy’ Fame has received a Nigerian spam mail. In a deviation from what one would normally expect, the spammer isn’t offering her millions of dollars but rather her continued existence in this universe.

As a person of science, you are aware that even changes at the quantum level cause universes to take separate but parallel infinite paths. I fear that if I am unable to continue my father’s schedule of experiments and therefore cause the photons in your immediate area to not have tilted in the way they already have, the life you have come to know and enjoy will cease to be and you will find yourself in a parallel existence unfavorable to you.

The bait? Apparently spammers father “who was dedicated to the study of RETROCAUSALITY[, …] revealed the break-through discovery of photon tilt patterns in the photons of your area based on experiments planned but yet to be performed by my father.”

He was also poisoned using yak milk at a conference in Geneva.

Cramer’s father, a real physicist, fortunately now knows to avoid the yak milk in Switzerland, culinarily known for chocolate and – – – actually chocolate. (Just checked, no yaks anywhere, they live in Siberia.) Bad geography knowledge Mr. Spammer but lucky for Ms Cramer who knew better.

Check out the whole post. It’s hilarious.

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