Feeding the Cyberelves

Remember my Defining Moments in Blogging #1, when the Washington Post linked to me for the first time? Have you been wondering why I almost always write out ‘The Washington Post’ in full instead of using the far more finger friendly WP?

Ah dear readers, it’s all about feeding the cyberelves at Technocrati.

Some people might use common search terms like ‘porn’, ‘bondage’, ‘midget sex’ or ‘mutant ninja dildo use’ to up their google ranks. I on the other hand simply mentally manipulate those little beasties, wandering the inter-tubes, on the watch for those mentioning WP articles. You see, if the full name of the above mentioned newspaper is used near a link to the appropritate article, you get added to the ‘Who’s Blogging?’ sidebar. *evil overlord laugh Bahahahahahaha!*

Shamefully upping my user counts? Guilty
Manipulating the opinion titbits on a major American newspaper web site? Guilty
Sending sexually charged e-mails to cyberelves? Me? Innocent – um – I have a drinking problem – um – I was abused by a cyberelf as a child!!


2 comments so far

  1. Teresa on

    Myself, I find the words “Wookie Scrotums” to be incredibly effective. Not a week goes by that I don’t gett a hit or two off a Google search for Wookie Scrotums.

    Also, for some reason, “Wilfred Brimley” gets a lot of play on Google.

    Ooooh! and the phrase “Drop Kick me Jesus”.

    And now you will reap the benefits as well.

    You’re welcome.

  2. blc303 on

    I haven’t really started analysing my search logs yet. It appears hate song in combination with references to 80’s Cindy Lauper titles is good-to-go.

    ALFs [the little hairy ones, not the animal confusers] seem to be rather obsessed with the idea of making cat bacon – or at least obsessed with the idea of taping bacon to cats. Indeed, for a time, my post actually out-googled the original blog, something I find very strange.

    I’m also still ‘first paged’ on Google with my ‘Curse You SkepChick’ post (together with her and Bad Astronomy – how’s that for cyber-neighbors?)

    More big brother-ish is the number of hits I’ve gotten from KBR (4), senate.gov (3), house.gov (2) and spiegel.de (1). Do I feel watched? Nah!

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